I am miss humble and miss judgmental!
I cannot tell you all that I have accomplished because I can’t stand the thought of someone judging me.
And when I hear someone else toot their horn? I feel this dip in my stomach; it just feels so wrong!
I am a humble person and when I hear someone talking about how they are the best thing since gluten-free bread; it makes me wonder….
WHY FEEL THE NEED TO TOOT YOUR OWN HORN? Are you insecure?
Then I judge away!!
Recently, I have been getting my head stuck in that horn; not allowing any tooting to be unleashed and judging everyone’s tooting.
Then I feel yuck; I know it is only my insecurities.
I wonder why I can’t talk about my accomplishments; I guess in part they don’t really seem like accomplishments. Anything wonderful that has happened has been the result of dumb luck.
Yet, if I don’t toot toot for me; who will?
If I don’t toot toot; how will you know I can help you?
The childhood memories also haunt me; I remember bragging about receiving a Malibu Barbie Doll when I was 9 years old and my next door neighbor telling me that “people don’t like a brag!” So, I gave myself self-care by shutting up.
How long will I allow my childhood to control my adulthood?
The line is drawn and I say NO MORE. One of the sweetest ways you or I can provide indulgent self-care is to acknowledge our gifts so others can notice theirs. I have put together 3 tips that will help you and me toot with integrity:
1. BAN I: I have a facebook friend who writes “I love my life.” after every status. Why? Is it a way to convince herself that she does or does she want others to feel crappy about their lives? When you toot; don’t say “I” or write “I” or record “I”. Instead make it about others. If it is on social media, visualize the person feeling good as a result of connecting with you. For example, instead of saying “I am a 6 figure coach (gross,who cares?) say “Through my programs; thousands of women have taken the Indulge Yourself challenge and I love hearing about all their successes. People don’t care about how much money you make but they do care about your impact.
2. ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL: Bob Burg is the master at this. If he was going to be a private advisor to President Obama; he would say something like this: Speaking to President Obama today, thank you Michelle Obama for inviting me. We know he is a big wig; but at the same time he is bringing up someone with him.
3. SAY THANK YOU AND DON’T SHUT UP!: I have the honor of knowing Shelley McGuire; who is a 52 year old women thriving with Cystic Fibrosis. She is a runner,gorgeous, extremely successful and fearless. Whenever I say “Shelley, you are such an inspiration.” She thanks me and returns the compliment: “Oh Mo, thank you and your strength inspires me everyday. I love the way you are with your children. Shelley didn’t poo poo my compliment; she received it graciously and returned the gift. What if you don’t know the person? Again, say thank you and if nothing else; it means a lot that you said that. Or you made my day!
BONUS: Embrace being perfectly imperfect: I am not a celebrity lover but I do love Rachael Ray because she is not afraid to show her flaws! She talks about cutting her fingers, burning bread and being impatient. When Martha Stewart said that Rachel wasn’t a real chef; she agreed! She embraced her imperfections and a nation loves her!
No one can relate to Miss perfect and trying to step into that role is abusive to your psyche and your body.
I am holding my horn ready to toot; FOR YOU! Leave me a comment below about what you and I will toot a song for you!